There is more to the people in our lives than we can see

I went to a funeral this weekend and it reminded me how little we know about the people in our lives. As the different people stood up and told stories about how this gentleman had affected their lives, the richness of who this man had been, came alive. I realized how much more I could have learned about him and the life he had led. I truly have missed out in not getting to know this person better.

I remember when I visited my aunt and one of her caregivers showed me a picture of my aunt on her phone. This caregiver considered my aunt her best friend. I was close to my aunt and had never even heard about this person. How could this be? Was I not asking the right questions or not showing an interest in my aunt’s life? I thought I was but now I don’t know. There was much more to her than I realized. I only saw her in relationship to who we were to each other. I didn’t see the many people she touched and how she affected the world.

It would be wonderful if we could take some time out and find out something new about the people we love. Try to see them as the world sees them. Find out more about how they make a difference in the world. Or if you can, try to see their world through their eyes. The people in our lives matter in more ways than we could ever imagine.

Have a kind and respectful day.

Interview with Todd Whatley, “Elder Law Issues” on Dec. 2nd, 9AM pacific

Listen to the Interview with Todd Whatley, “Elder Law Issues” on Dec. 2nd, 9AM pacific BlogTalkRadio.com/kindethics

Todd was a Physical Therapist for 13 years working in home health and nursing homes. He graduated from the Bowen school of law in 1998. He has been in private practice since 1999 and focused on elder law since 2000. He became Arkansas’ second Certified Elder Law Attorney in 2006.

Todd is on the leadership council of the Alzheimer’s Association. He is a regular speaker for Alzheimer’s Association. Todd has been on KATV’s Good Morning Arkansas discussing elder law issues. Todd spoke April 22, 2006 at the National Academy of Elder Conference in Washington D.C. on lawsuits to increase the spousal share in Medicaid applications. He is also an adjunct Professor at the University of Arkansas School of Law teaching Elder Law. He should complete his Masters of Law (LL.M.) course in Elder Law in December 2009.

Certified Elder Law Attorney*

Todd Whatley is a Certified Elder Law Attorney*. What does that mean? It means that he focuses his practice on the needs of the elderly client and their family and that the National Elder Law Foundation has certified Mr. Whatley with requisite amount of experience and knowledge to hold this distinction. Todd is a regular speaker for Continuing Legal Education seminars teaching other attorneys about elder law.

Website: http://www.elderlaw-ar.com
Blog: http://arkansaselderlawblog.com
Email: todd@elderlaw-ar.com

* as certified by the National Elder Law Foundation, an ABA approved organization for certifying specialists.

Taking Action to Solve the Healthcare Conflict

Quote of the day by William James: “Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.”

Taking Action to Solve the Healthcare Conflict

It doesn’t matter who is the problem or who is at fault. You have to take action now to get the conflict resolved and to move forward taking care of your loved one. If you have been part of the problem, say you’re sorry. If you aren’t the problem, don’t worry about getting an apology. You don’t have time to stay angry. Your loved one needs help. The first thing you want to do is to deal with any conflicts when they first arise instead of letting them escalate. There are problem solvers throughout the hospital: The social worker, the charge nurse, the chaplain, the bioethics committee, the hospital administrator and in some places an ombudsman. These people have been trained to help facilitate the conflicts that occur in the hospital. If the conflict is happening in the doctor’s office, then you are on your own. But don’t worry, after you read the next few pages, you will be a much better problem solver yourself.

The first thing you need to do is to look at your role in the conflict. Am I making this situation better or worse? What could I do to make this situation better? Is this how I would react on a normal day? Or am I just overwhelmed, afraid, in shock or in grief and I’m having a hard time coping with this situation? Sometimes we need to take a timeout to catch our breath before we can interact with others and make any meaningful decisions. It is normal for you to feel the pressures and weight of these decisions. When any of us are in a crisis, we are not at our best. But unfortunately, you may not have the time to process what you’re going through and be able to feel like yourself again. Sometimes we have to make the decisions while we are stressed. Let people know how hard this is for you so they will understand what you are going through.

A couple of questions, you can ask yourself, may help you begin to see the situation differently. Are you making inaccurate assumptions? Sometimes we have misunderstood or not heard correctly what has been said to us. Before you get upset, make sure that you have the right information.

Are you more interested in “being right” or “getting it right”? This is a tough one. If you are determined that your way is the only way you, then you are going to have a difficult time resolving the conflicts with the healthcare team. Too often people discover that the way they thought things should go, turns out to be a mistake. I have seen this many times when the bioethics committee comes in to help with the ethical dilemma. The doctor is determined that his way is the right way and he is frustrated that the patient will not agree. Or the patient’s loved one comes in ready to do battle. Here’s what happens. As the meeting goes on, the people in the room hear the other parts of the story that they didn’t know before. Perhaps the doctor finds out that the reason the patient doesn’t want to do the surgery is because there’s no one at home to take care of them. The patient isn’t trying to be difficult, they are just feeling helpless. Or the patient’s family finds out that they have misunderstood what the doctors said about the disease or the possibilities of a cure. Once the misunderstandings have been cleared up, people calm down and new decisions can be made.

You have a lot of power in all of these interactions. You have the power to escalate or de-escalate the anger. You might say something like, “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” Well you can say this but it is only going to make the other person angry and you will still be no closer to getting what your loved one needs. Instead you might want to try a different approach. You might want to say, “Let me see if I understand what you are saying.” Or, “It seems like we both are trying to achieve the same thing but in different ways. Maybe if we …” If you think there is some miscommunication going on you can say, “I heard what you said. Let me repeat it back to you to see if I have understood you correctly.”

When I tell people this idea, people will say to me, “I don’t like what they are saying and I don’t agree with what they are saying.” Of course you don’t agree. You are in a conflict. But I never said you should agree. All I said was that you should listen to their point of view. This is the secret that mediators use to solve dilemmas all the time. One of the main things a mediator does is to help the people in the room to stop and listen to each other. You are listening to figure out if there is new information you didn’t hear before, or if there is some kind of misunderstanding or if you can understand more about why the other person is so passionate about their point of view.

This is where your power is in the middle of the conflict. It is not in raising your voice or pushing for everyone to do it your way. The power comes from understanding what is really going on and hearing what the other person needs you to know about what this means to them. I will never say that to listen means to agree; not at all. It just means to listen.

When you listen to resolve a conflict, the anger and emotions will decrease and your empathy will increase. You may surprise yourself when you finally hear what they are really saying because you may find yourself feeling more compassionate and understanding of their position. You will know that the listening is working when the other person begins to calm down. The more you listen, the more you will be able to hear the deeper message behind the other person’s words. Unless you have a really bad person in the room, you need to remember that the people helping your loved one want your loved one to get better too. (If there is someone who is really bad on the healthcare team, why are you keeping them on your team? You are allowed to change who is caring for you in a hospital. You can always ask for a different doctor to be your doctor.)

You are probably not disagreeing about the goal of getting your loved one better; you are probably just disagreeing on the how. Give the person you are arguing with the benefit of the doubt and stop and listen to what they have to offer. You may like what you hear. (I have seen in many bioethics meetings that people will completely change their minds and agree with the other side once they understand what is really going on.)

You won’t be able to solve the problem until you understand the interests behind the position. What does this mean? It means that what the person is saying he wants is only part of the issue. The trick is to figure out what the demand really represents. Let me give you an example. The loved one is demanding that the patient get CPR. The doctor wants the patient to be made a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate). Now there is a conflict.

If I was helping these two to solve their conflict, I would first listen to try to figure out why it is so important to them to have their way. I would ask the patient’s loved one, “Why it is so important to have the patient get CPR?” They may tell me that they are desperate for the person to recover so they can ask for forgiveness. They haven’t been a good son and they want to say I’m sorry. Or they might say that it is against the patient’s religion to be a DNR. Or they might tell me that the patient said he would want CPR and they are trying to honor his wishes.

Do you begin to see now why what they want matters? If I can figure out why they want ____, then I can figure out how to help them. (And I figure this out by listening.) The same thing goes for the doctor. Why does the doctor want the patient to be DNR? Well perhaps the patient is close to dying and the doctor knows CPR won’t work. Or the doctor doesn’t want to prolong the suffering of the patient. Or the doctor doesn’t want to lose the business. Again, do you see why the why matters?

This is the power of listening. You can discover what is really going on behind the person’s demands and begin to figure out a way to solve it together. When you are listening, focus on figuring out what you have in common. Are you both trying to get the patient better? Are you both trying to respect the patient’s wishes? Anything you can find in common will become a starting place for problem solving.

I would like to give you a couple of quick tips to help you problem solve. The first is to separate the person from the problem. How do we do this? In these situations, it becomes a conflict between “my way” and “your way”. And we just keep battling until either one of us wins or we both get more frustrated. This doesn’t do the patient any good and it wastes our time. Let me give you an example. The patient comes in and he hasn’t been taking his medication. Usually the doctor would say, “Why haven’t you been taking your medication?” And what the doctor really means is, “Why are you being a problem?” This approach rarely works. So, instead you might want to say to the patient, “How are you and I going to solve the problem of the medicine getting into you?” The problem becomes the third person in the room. You have separated the person from the problem. Now the patient isn’t the problem, the problem is the problem. This takes the pressure off the situation and the two of you can begin to brainstorm to figure out a workable solution.

One quick note before you start brainstorming, make sure you remember to understand what the real issue is before you start. It is a waste of your time to work on solving the wrong problem. Is the patient not taking his medicine because he can’t afford it? Is he not taking his medicine because he doesn’t like the way it makes him feel? Or is he not able to cut the pill in half or open the medicine bottle? These are just a few examples of the many reasons a patient might not be taking the medications. Figure out what the real issue is and you’ll be able to solve the problem together.

The second tip is to use brainstorming to come up with more options. Brainstorming is when everyone comes up with new ideas on how to solve the problem. One technique which mediators use is to make sure the people in the conflict come up with at least three alternatives. This begins to break the conflict right away. It is no longer my way versus your way. As you begin, you can start with my way, your way or do nothing then work from there. You will find that the more options you can think of, the more likely you will be able to find a solution that people can live with. As you continue to brainstorm, you might realize that you could do a little bit of what you want and a little bit of what they want. Or you could throw out both of your plans and start again. Not only does brainstorming create a safe place to come up with new options but because you two are doing it together, it will change the experience from a combative process into a collaborative process.

Another you might want to do is to take a “time-out”. Not only does it help people calm down but in it also allows people to think about what has been discussed and to process what they have learned about the situation. We have all heard the phrase, “I have to sleep on it.” Sometimes we have to have patience and allow the other person some time to think. If you try to push someone who is not ready into making a decision, you may get a decision but it probably won’t last. The person will come back the next day and say, “I changed my mind.” I am not surprised when this happens because the person wasn’t ready to decide in the first place. Also, in some cultures, people need to go home and talk with their family or religious and community advisors. Allow people the space and time to make good decisions.

The most important part of this process is to work together. If you stay in a battle mode, you will continue to battle. When you stay in the war, the patient loses. Take responsibility for your part and make the effort to fix the situation. Be willing to say, “I was wrong. Or, I didn’t understand.” Realize that you can disagree without being disrespectful and hurtful. Figure out how you can invite this person into the problem solving process with you, especially during healthcare conflicts. You are still going to have to deal with this doctor or person on the healthcare team tomorrow. So it is better to peacefully resolve the issues than to create a battleground. Take the time to listen so you can begin to understand and empathize with the other person. You have the power to turn the conflict into an opportunity for things to get better.

Have a kind and respectful day.

One more great medical office, Kathryn Fallon and Wendy Lit, Doctors of Optometry

MY FAVORITE DOCTOR’S OFFICE, by Susan Harris

Of all the doctors’ offices I have been to, (and there have been many), there is one that stands out as being “The Best”. It is the office of Kathryn Fallon and Wendy Lit, Doctors of Optometry. I found them in a rather unscientific way. At the time, I was wearing contact lenses, and was searching for an office in my vision plan which sold them at the lowest price. I started down the list, making phone calls. In some cases I was put on hold for way too long; in others, my call was answered by someone who sounded stressed and/or annoyed. And then I called Drs. Fallon and Lit’s office. The phone was answered by the office manager, Bonnie, whose voice was friendly, welcoming, and felt like a ray of sunshine. I knew instantly that I had found the office I had been looking for.

Having now been a patient for many years, I can tell you that I always feel welcome when I walk in the door and am greeted by name. Although I have been cared for primarily by Dr. Lit, who is charismatic and caring, I have the utmost confidence in the medical care given by both doctors. I rarely, if ever, have been made to wait to see the doctor, and when I do have to wait, it is always with apologies.

I always look forward to going to this office, and have even dropped by with a special treat just to say “thank you” to everyone in the office.

Whether or not this letter is accepted as a “winner”, the doctors and staff at this office are already “winners” in my book. I sing their praises regularly.

Having patience with a senior loved one

I understand that it isn’t easy to be patient with a loved one that is aging or has a physical or mental limitation. I know that I have tried to hurry along a loved one with little success. But it is important to understand that our loved ones aren’t doing this to annoy us. They are just at a different stage of life. As a people age, the need to be in a rush and to get a lot done changes. Older seniors have more important things to focus on, the work of aging. There are two main tasks that need to be accomplished: Keeping control over as much of their life as possible and legacy work. The need to keep a sense of control and power over one’s life is necessary as the seniors begin to experience significant losses. Seniors are losing their health, their abilities and those around them begin to die. As people come to terms with what they are losing, the need to hold on to what power they can becomes even more important.

This is why when you come in and try to take over our loved one’s life, it is not seen as being helpful, but as you trying to dominate the person. We rush our loved ones and try to make them go at the speed that we prefer. The need to rush and get things accomplished is our agenda, not theirs. It is important to remember that the senior is not in a rush. He or she is trying to enjoy and appreciate the time remaining.

Not only are seniors trying to keep control but another even more important task needs to be done. Legacy work. This is when the aging are trying to make sense of and to make peace with how their lives have gone. They want to be remembered. They want to be able to tell their story and to know that someone is listening. When seniors repeat a story, it serves many purposes. The need to make sure our families will remember our history so they can share it with future generations and the need to re-tell the story themselves so they can make sense of what has gone before. If you can, take the time to reinforce that the senior in your life matters and that he or she has made a difference.

Some day, we will all be in this stage of life and will need to accomplish these tasks as well. This is no different from a toddler needing to learn to walk or a teenager learning independence. This is just a part of life. Perhaps we could be a little more patient and understand that these life tasks do not happen in a hurry. Maybe there is something we can learn along the way if we slow down, listen and connect with the seniors in our lives in a more profound and meaningful way.

For more information about how to communicate in a way that respects the journey of the senior, read David L. Solie’s book, How To Say It To Seniors.

Have a kind and respectful day.

Having patience with your senior patients

I understand that it isn’t easy to have patience with a patient that is aging or has a physical or mental limitation. I know that I have tried to hurry patients along with little success. But it is important to understand that our senior patients aren’t doing this to annoy us. They are just at a different stage of life. As a people age, the need to be in a rush and to get a lot done changes. Older seniors have more important things to focus on, the work of aging. There are two main tasks that need to be accomplished: Keeping control over as much of their life as possible and legacy work. The need to keep a sense of control and power over one’s life is necessary as the seniors begin to experience significant losses. Seniors are losing their health, their abilities and those around them begin to die. As people come to terms with what they are losing, the need to hold on to what power they can becomes even more important.

This is why when you come in and tell the senior that they should do what you are telling them, you are not being seen as a trusted healer but as someone who is trying to boss them around. Yes you are in a hurry and yes the senior patient takes longer, but that is not the senior’s fault. The need to rush and get things scheduled is our agenda, not theirs. It is important to remember that the senior is not in a rush. He or she is trying to enjoy and appreciate the time remaining. If you can, allow the senior patient the time to think about the options. Ask your senior patients to tell you what is important to them and what they think of the options you have presented. Perhaps it would be best if you let them go home to consider what is best for their lives, then have them come back in or call you with their answers. Just because you think this is the right treatment plan for them, doesn’t mean that they agree.

One other thing to be aware of is that the senior is also doing legacy work. This is when the aging are trying to make sense of and to make peace with how their lives have gone. They want to be remembered. They want to be able to tell their story and to know that someone is listening. When seniors repeat a story, it serves many purposes. They need to make sure our families will remember our history so they can share it with future generations and the need to re-tell the story themselves so they can make sense of what has gone before. If you can, take the time to hear your senior patients and connect with the person they are, not the disease they represent.

For more information about how to communicate in a way that respects the journey of the senior, read David L. Solie’s book, How To Say It To Seniors.

Have a kind and respectful day.

Another great medical office, Dr. Aaron Hertel from Hertel and Brown, Erie, PA

Submitted by Andrea Reynolds for her dad, Wesley Reynolds.

My 89 year old Dad’s DPT (Doctor of Physical Therapy (Aaron Hertel) is willing to put in
a handicap parking spot at his front door so Dad can get in and out of the van more
easily. See the photo of the front door at Frontier Place: http://www.hertelandbrown.com/
Most of their patients are young athletes. We already have the Handicap Placard, just not
the place to park.

Hertel and Brown, Frontier Place, 1337 West 6th Street, Erie, PA 16505

Andrea Reynolds, THE CRISIS CLINIC
I champion for justice if you’ve been
cheated, mistreated, or swindled. Retain
me to restore your money, property, reputation.
http://www.AndreaReynolds.com/crisisbrainstorm

Winner of Best Office Story: Dr. William Lyons of Long Beach, California

Medical Office Winner: William Lyons, M.D., 4301 Atlantic Ave., Long Beach, California

From Randa, his patient:

I have several specialty doctors like many others. Thus, evaluating and determining impressive offices is an activity to engage in while waiting. The details of my impressive office begin before I get there. I know the parking will be simple and with no parking fee. The office is on the ground floor. This adds up to saved time and money. I know before arriving that I can treat myself to reading a book or writing notes while waiting. (and rarely is the wait long). It is a treat because the waiting room is comfortable, windows to see the outdoors, and NO TV blaring. Maybe there will be soft music playing and always an abundance of RECENT, quality periodicals to tempt me over the book I brought. The receptionist is like a welcoming friend. She takes the time for short conversation and always alerts me and the other patients if the doctor is delayed and how long it might be. It is a restful place.

The office is impressive because of the doctor. An internist with specialty in oncology and hematology with two offices. I see him in his internal medicine office. I can best describe him as “superb family doctor type” with specialties: asks about my family, knows my interests, refreshes himself on details of my chart, listens to me, answers all questions, and even more importantly teaches me on the recent medical/medication advances. Have you ever had the doctor assist you in taking off your jacket and hanging it up? Have you ever had the doctor jot down a reminder to himself to provide you with a resource for an interest of yours not related to exam? Have you ever had the doctor go over every details of your lab reports? Have you ever had the doctor alert you to some basic safety issues to protect you? Have you ever had a perceptive doctor who seemed to know you had other things on your mind and ask you about it? William Lyons, M.D., 4301 Atlantic Ave., Long Beach provides me with an IMPRESSIVE doctor’s office.

Both Randa and Dr. Lyon’s office will be getting a cake from BakeAWish.com http://tinyurl.com/rylvyz

Long Term Care Insurance, An article from Lauren Gershen’s Newsletter

Here Lauren’s interview at https://kindethics.com/2010/01/interview-with-long-term-care-insurance-expert-on-nov-27th-11am-pacific/?preview=true&preview_id=1478&preview_nonce=7efffc855d

In the years following World War II, there were many babies born which created what has come to be called the Baby Boom. Comprised of persons born between 1946 and 1964, “baby boomers” are one of the largest segments of our society.

With the oldest boomer quickly approaching retirement age, it’s time that boomers asked themselves some important questions: How are you preparing for retirement? Is it possible that you could outlive your retirement savings? Have you faced the possibility that you may need long term care at some point, either in your home, in assisted care, or in a nursing home?

Here are some facts to consider:
• 60% of Americans who reach age 65 are expected to need LTC services at some point, while 40% of those receiving LTC services now are ages 18 to 64, says OPM [Office of Personnel Management].
”A federal case for LTC”
Employee Benefit News, 02/01/03
• The national average cost of a year in a nursing home is $57,700.
Nursing Home Cost of Care Survey
Conducted by Evans Research, an independent research firm, 7/31/03
• Many of the Baby Boomers over age 55 mistakenly believe they are adequately covered for long-term care expenses through their workplace benefits packages. However, their health plans may only cover very limited long-term care expenses. As a result, many Boomers unknowingly face the risk of having their accumulated assets depleted by long-term health expenses that follow an unexpected event in their lives.
”Conning’s Industry Insight: Long Term Care Insurance.”
Issue #4, June 2002

Sobering facts, to be sure. And yet, many of us stubbornly cling to the belief that we will never need long term care. Above all, this shows how vital it is that we become better educated.

First, it’s important to understand what long term care is. Long term care provided under a tax qualified policy is defined by federal law as care for a person who requires assistance with at least two of six activities of daily living – bathing, continence, dressing, feeding, toileting, transferring – for a condition that is expected to last at least 90 days; or care for a person who has severe cognitive impairment, such as Alzheimer’s disease.

It’s important to recognize that includes many types of situations that can result in the need for long term care at any age, not just limited to senior citizens.

Next, it’s time to seriously examine some difficult questions.
Who will provide the long term care we may need? Many of us think our spouses or other loved ones will care for us, regardless of the level of care we need or the level of skill our families have in health care delivery. But, depending how events unfold, that may be impractical or even impossible.
Who will pay for the long term care we may need? Many people believe they can self-fund their long term care needs. But even the most effective savers should calculate how long their assets might last if drawn upon to pay the costs of long term care.
Others believe the government will pay for the long term care they may need. But today, Medicare will only pay some of the expenses for up to 100 days in a skilled nursing home if you qualify at all, and will only pay for certain types of skilled care in your own home. And what will happen to Medicare benefits when baby boomers begin turning 65 in 10 years is an open question.

Long term care insurance can help you provide for yourself.
It is critical that baby boomers understand that the cost of a long term care insurance policy today can be quite affordable, especially when compared to the cost of long term care. But each year the purchase is delayed, the higher the rates generally become.

Compare the cost of long term care insurance premiums paid over even 10 or 12 years to as little as one year in a nursing home, and you’ll see how valuable long term care insurance protection can be in terms of dollars and cents.

Finally, there’s the knowledge that, if you need long term care, with long term care insurance you will have choices about where you receive care, that you will have coverage to help pay for that care, and that the responsibility for providing care may not fall to your family. These choices can also help preserve your financial independence and your dignity, and those are priceless.

Lauren V. Gershen CLTC
Planning For Quality of Life
Long Term Care Planning & Insurance Specialist
LGershen@aol.com
(760) 777-9061 Office
(760) 777-9062 Fax

Visiting hours – When to follow the rules and when to break them

There are no visiting hours at nursing homes. You are allowed to visit your loved one at any time of the day or night. Don’t let them tell you that you are not allowed. In fact, I encourage you to stop by either very early or very late to check on how your loved one is being treated by the night nurses.

There are visiting hours at hospitals to make sure that the patients have enough quiet time to heal. Sleep and rest are crucial for the person that is recovering from an illness or surgery. There also needs to be time that the nurses and other staff can get their work done without you being in the way.

In general, I respect visiting hours. But I know that there are times when visiting hours should be respectfully broken. When someone is dying, there should be open visiting as you will want to spend every precious last moment with your loved one before they die. Or, you may want to ask if you can be of help keeping the patient calm when the person is afraid or is sundowning so the nurses have time to care for all of their patients on the floor. Or perhaps you can help when the person needs to be in restraints. It is great if you can sit with the person to keep them relaxed or distracted and reduce the need for restraints. There may be cultural reasons as well to stay after hours as many people feel safer when someone from their culture/family is present.

If you are going to be there after visiting hours, then you have to be there to help, not to get in the way. If you are constantly bothering the nurses and making it hard for them to take care of the many different patients they have to see that night, then you are being a problem. And the nurse has the right to ask you to leave. Visiting a patient is not a right but a privilege. If you are impeding in the healing process of your loved one or other patients, then the hospital can ask you to leave.

In the early days after my mom’s stroke, my brothers and I took turns sleeping on the floor beside my mother’s hospital bed. My mom was a difficult patient. She would scream out for help, she was afraid of hospitals and she was also very obese. I was able to help comfort my mom so she didn’t bother the nurses as much and I was also able to help the nurse turn her when needed. Nowadays, I wouldn’t advise helping to move a patient. As family members, we haven’t been trained in how to lift appropriately and may put ourselves at risk of injuries. I made sure that I didn’t get in the nurses way and tried to help in anyway possible.

If you are going to be there after hours, be polite, be appreciative, be helpful and be respectful of the healthcare staff. They are allowing you a privilege to be there after hours so make sure you say thank you.

Have a kind and respectful day.

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