A Life Lesson from Aunt Berda – Coping with a Chronic Illness

My Aunt Berda was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis when she was 31. She was amazing as she didn’t even use a wheelchair until her late 70’s. I asked her about her symptoms one day and she explained to me that she had constant numbness and tingling. I was shocked. If you met my aunt, you would think that she didn’t have any physical suffering with her MS. But she did. I asked her about how she handled the symptoms while keeping her good nature. Here is what she told me.

She said that when she was first diagnosed as a young woman, she spent 30 days in the hospital paralyzed. She made a decision at that time that if she had to be a patient, then she would be a good-natured patient. She didn’t need to make life miserable for those who were caring for her. She said that every day she wakes up and “Chooses to be happy.” That it is an active choice. Maybe two days a year, the symptoms got the best of her but most of the time she kept to this decision. Did the MS affect her? Of course, but she kept her good nature and chose to give to others everyday. She was a wonderful listener and provided a supportive ear to all that interacted with her. I knew she was special but I was still surprised when a nursing assistant said to me, “Look at this.” I looked at the cell phone she held out to me and a picture of my aunt and this caregiver was the main picture on the phone. This caregiver said that my aunt was her best friend. And I didn’t even know about it. It was a powerful lesson in knowing that no matter what the circumstances we find ourselves in, we have a choice. We can choose to make a difference. We can choose to be happy. My aunt died last year but her lesson lives on.

Choose to have a kind and respectful day.