Getting Caregivers to Ask for Help – Viki’s Four-Step Process
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. Leo Buscaglia I have never been very good at asking for help and like many family caregivers, I didn’t think that my own needs mattered. Thinking I had to do everything all the time caused me to have two breakdowns; once during my early years of caregiving and again the last year of my caregiving journey. (I was ...
My New Quality-of-Life Statement to Attach to My Advance Directive
The goal of writing a quality-of-life statement is to have it express your personal preferences and to have it sound like you. One of the problems with many of the legal/medical forms is that they all sound alike and they don’t allow your voice to be heard. I encourage you to use the categories I have listed below to express what you would want people to know about you if you were too sick to speak for yourself. You can use some of my language from my document below if you would like but my goal is ...
GO WISH Cards – A wonderful tool to explain what you want if you were seriously ill
Coda Alliance presents the 'Go Wish Game'. It gives you an easy, entertaining way to think and talk about what's important to you if you become seriously ill. The starter game comes with two packs of cards in contrasting colors and instructions for using the cards individually or in pairs. For more information about the game, and to play on-line, visit www.gowish.org. Reach And Teach Says: "A woman at church came up to us and thanked us for having introduced her to Go Wish. She had given her mother a deck of Go Wish cards and had gone through the deck once with ...
Free – Thinking Ahead Workbook and Videos available for those with Developmental Disabilities and other Cognitive Impairments
Good news. The California Coalition for Compassionate Care has created a workbook and set of videos for documenting the wishes of those with developmental delays. (It would also work well for those with other cognitive impairments.) You can get free copies of the workbook sent to you or you can download it directly. It is called "Thinking Ahead." Here is the website: http://www.coalitionccc.org/thinking-ahead.php Thinking Ahead: My Life at the End - Enables people with developmental disabilities to advocate for themselves and stay in control of their lives through the very end. Thinking Ahead: My Life at the End contains words, ...
Drowning but can’t reach for a life vest: families, caregivers, doctors, nurses and many others helping professionals
I had such a sad experience recently. I was speaking to a group of doctors and presenting them some techniques to make their lives easier. (This was at a county hospital which deals with the most underprivileged of our community.) I was surprised by how many of the doctors in the room were so resistant to accepting help. I sensed from their comments how burnt out they were and how hopeless they had become. The system they are working under is so broken that they couldn’t imagine that anything could change or be made better. ...
When you are going the wrong way, turn around.
When we are making the decisions for those in our care, it is important to make sure that the decision is still working. You may find that you made the best medical decision you could and then the plan didn’t work. When this happens, it is important to reconsider the treatment plan. Otherwise, you’re driving down the wrong road: You can keep driving and driving, but you will never get to where you are going. You need to stop, ask for new directions and then start down a new path. You may also need to modify your expectations when things ...
Patience – Lessons Learned – Viki’s Journey
Patience – Lessons Learned - KindEthics.com Newsletter Quote of the Month: The individual is capable of both great compassion and great indifference. He has it within his means to nourish the former and outgrow the latter. Norman Cousins I love when life reminds me of the lessons that I thought I had learned, but then I find out I need a refresher course. This month’s newsletter is about having patience, but not just your average patience, instead good-natured and seeking to understand patience. There are two parts to this story. The second part first: Two weeks ago I had to make about 50 phone ...
The medical decision is just part of life’s equation.
So many people ask me what they should be thinking about when making medical decisions. Whether you are making your own decisions or having to make decisions for others, there is a lot to think about. Your doctor or your loved one's doctor will talk to you about the medical aspects of any health-related decision. But that doesn’t mean that you are limited to thinking only about medicine. It may be important to consider the financial costs associated with the treatment plan, if the patient’s religion should play a role in the decision and whether there are cultural issues that ...
Great new guide for when you leave the hospital
Too often we spend a lot of time thinking about going into the hospital but no time thinking about coming home. The hospital discharge process is when patients are vulnerable to misunderstandings and errors. The patient is feeling sick and not able to listen to the instructions, the loved one may or may not be there, and the nurse rushes through the crucial information. If you can, make sure you have a loved one beside you when the nurse goes over the discharge instructions. If you have questions, ask until you get the answers you need. ...
Welcome
Welcome to the combined website for KindEthics.com and TheCaregiversPath.com. Although they are distinctly different, they have been interwoven here because they share a common mission: treating each other and ourselves with kindness and respect. Whether it’s empowering caregivers, giving voice to those who need protecting, or resolving conflicts peacefully, Viki helps people find the courage to do the right thing. And with this comes peace of mind. Viki is her name, “Kind.” This website and the KindEthics blog will provide you practical help and solutions for the situations you are facing. Click here for the book, The Caregiver’s Path to Compassionate Decision Making: Making Choices for Those Who Can’t.”
“Viki inspires her audiences with compassion and mesmerizes them with the practical application of her knowledge.”
“Viki is the compassionate and KIND voice of reason for doctors, patients and staff.”
"Viki helped me in my crisis. There was no wait, no down time, and she knew her stuff!"
For Patients & Families
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Read More Posts From This CategoryFor Healthcare Professionals
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Too often we underestimate the power of...
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Read More Posts From This CategoryEthics In Action
The Cards I’ve Been Dealt is a wonderful new resource available for facilitating conversations about the important transitions in a senior’s life or for creating your own amazing second half of life. If you like the Go Wish Cards (www.gowish.org) for end-of-life decision making, then you are going to love... [Read more of this review]
By Carole Larkin MA,CMC,CAEd,QDCS,EICS ThirdAge Services LLC in Dallas, Tesas thirdageservices@gmail.com www.thirdageservices.com Tips for communicating with a mid-stage (or later) Alzheimer’s patient Ever feel like your loved one is ignoring you or that you just weren’t getting through to your loved one?... [Read more of this review]
Here is another wonderful idea Hayes Rowan sent to me for how we can show love and comfort to those who might need a little support. Here is what he wrote: Like to ask, if we may, all you good folks out there to make two bouquets of dried flowers this summer, & bring one to the nearby nursing home, giving... [Read more of this review]
Read More Posts From This CategoryAsk Viki
I have been sending out Kindness Reminders to many people who want to make sure that they reach out to show their love to a person who lives far away, a senior in a care community, or someone who just needs a little tender, loving care. If you would like to sign up for these reminders, sign up at the top right... [Read more of this review]
Over and over again, I’ve sat in rooms with 30 doctors, and I’ve asked the question, “How many of you refer patients to hospice? Early or late? Out of the 30 doctors perhaps five will raise their hand And usually the referral is made very close to the patient’s death. This is terrible. Patients and... [Read more of this review]
Coda Alliance presents the ‘Go Wish Game’. It gives you an easy, entertaining way to think and talk about what’s important to you if you become seriously ill. The starter game comes with two packs of cards in contrasting colors and instructions for using the cards individually or in pairs. For... [Read more of this review]
Read More Posts From This CategoryKind Ethics Radio Show
Join me as I interview Insurance Expert, Maura Carley on Dec. 7, 9AM PST/12PM EST on blogtalkradio.com/kindethics http://www.healthcarenavigation.com About Maura Carley: Maura Carley MPH, CIC, President and CEO, has extensive background in healthcare. She founded Healthcare Navigation, LLC, a patient advocacy... [Read more of this review]
I will be interviewing Martha Stettinius, the author of Inside the Dementia Epidemic: A Daughter’s Memoir on October 15, 10AM PDT/1PM PDT. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/kindethics/2012/10/15/martha-stettinius-author-of-inside-the-dementia-epidemic “Inside the Dementia Epidemic: A Daughter’s Memoir,”... [Read more of this review]
Join me as I guest host Joni Aldrich’s show, “Caregiver SOS,” on Wednesday, Sept. 5 at 11AM PDT, 2PM EDT on http://w4wn.com/radio-personalities/joni-aldrich/ I am so excited to be interviewing Reverend Dale as we discuss “Is There an Extended Family Feud in Your Future? How You Can Plan... [Read more of this review]
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